Seasons Of Change

The beautiful Sabine Rich print “Changing Seasons” is a good reflection of myself.  Those who know me well, know how much a challenge change can be for yours truly.  Change is good.  Change is evolution.  Change is inevitable.  I get that, but change is hard for me.  I’m extremely OCD who likes consistency. 

My hunka hunka is a free-spirited soul.  He pulls things out of the air when it comes to his mind.  He doesn’t like a schedule.   I sit and schedule everything.  My life is an Excel spreadsheet.  I like to plan ahead.  I struggle a bit when kinks are thrown.  I don’t necessarily roll with the punches.  I’m more like a concrete block rolling down a rocky hill, clumping every different way possible.

Change is part of life.  Without change, there is no growth.  Sigh.

Change as it may, here I am today. 

Two weeks ago I walked away from a job of nearly 12 years and embarked on a new career.   I nervously walked into my new position with a regulated mind.  I’m trained to think with a stringent mindset.  I love consistency and organization.  I have entered a more carefree environment.  Whoa…not so regulated.  I don’t need a formal signature for everything.  I can go to the bathroom without formal approval of signatures.  OK…that last part may be a tad exaggerated…or is it?

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I went from private offices to cubicle setting.  Do these people not know how loud of a mouth I have?  My hunka hunka says I whisper like a cheerleader.  I’m not sure I know how to talk soft.  My inside voice is loud, too.   He even bought me a shirt that says, “I’m not yelling.  I’m from Kentucky.  We just talk loud.”  My hours have changed.  That’s very different for me.  I believe that was the biggest change for me to adjust, aside from changing my job itself.

I love the calmness of their more relaxed thought-process, but that comes with adaptability. My laptop is on order and that’s okay.  My first weekend following the start of my new career was awkward.  I had a sense of  disconnection.  For the first time in double digit years, I didn’t have a work laptop.  I didn’t have international people contacting me for questions or concerns.  I didn’t have to log onto my network to check status.  I didn’t have email on my phone.  I didn’t have a calendar to tell me of upcoming meetings.  WTH!  How am I supposed to know what I’m going to do?!    It was the weirdest feeling.  I can’t imagine I’m the only one who has ever felt this way.  You mean I’m going to be able to go on vacation and NOT take my work laptop.  GET OUT!  I cannot recall having a laptop-free vacation.  It was always connected to me at the hip in the past.

At my new job I have a former coworker from my past job who has been here a few months.  Follow me? I felt like she was here waiting on me.  At the other job, we worked three offices from each other, but never really talked, except for idle chit chat which acquaintances tend to do.  Now we are on multiple floors apart and quite a walking distance from each other, but I feel we are closer than before.  We now have a weekly lunch and I find myself laughing so much.  I find myself more relaxed and a sense of peace.  At my other job, I would sit in my closed office and now I’m outwardly laughing at lunch.  Maybe we both needed a change.  We were discussing my blog and how I love to express my crazy thoughts from my noodle.  I told her the changes I have been experiencing at this new job.  She was like, “You should blog about it.”  Here ya go, folks.  My blog on change. 

I look back at my prior job.  I don’t miss it like I thought I would.  I miss my coffee buddy.  I miss talking about my Gracie Mae and laughing about our dogs’ crazy antics.  I miss the already knowing how to do everything.  Part of change, right?

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My hunka hunka says he sees a different person in me now.  He sees a more relaxed person.  He sees me actually enjoy going to work rather than dreading it, this is even before my morning coffee.  That’s saying a lot.  I guess that’s part of my change, as well.   Adaptability to my new environment.  It is amazing what you are able to get accustomed to.

This morning it was raining a monsoon, which I guess is better than snow.  I have been driving myself to work where my hunka hunka used to drive me to my old job every day.  I was very spoiled.  We enjoyed those times.  I enjoy the peacefulness of driving now while developing my thoughts of what the day may hold, even though I almost forgot how to use that big round thing my first morning for my new job when I got in the driver’s seat.    

While so many aspects are changing for the better at my new job, I asked my hunka hunka to drive me to work today, like old times.  I felt like a princess being dropped off at the door.  I loved being able to turn around and blow him a kiss goodbye before heading in for my day.   I would guess he enjoyed it, as well. 

Changing careers was a change for the better.   Toxicity can be consuming.   

I take baby steps each day and remind myself change is good as I smile when I walk into work and smile even bigger when I walk out because I know I can relax when the day is done.  Let’s not forget walking out to see my hunka hunka and my Gracie Mae waiting on me is a huge bonus, too. 

As the season will change soon, I’m looking forward to the possibilities ahead.

Speaking of change, my dear hunka hunka dropped me off at home while he took my vehicle to get an oil change.  I truly am one lucky girl and very blessed to have him.  I cannot say that enough.

Cheers to changes! Cheers to new sunrises!  Cheers to seasons of change!

Peace out, trout!

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