I looked at my last blog and didn’t realize it’s been nearly three months. Work and life are busy, but good.

Weather is becoming so amazing. Come on summer. Come on heat. Come on humidity. I want it all.

I have been going back and forth on whether or not I will continue writing my blogs. This truly has been a great place for many years during some tough times in my life. I made a lot of transitions. Some good. Some bad. If I admitted why I truly kept this going, my followers would think I’m a nut case, which is partially true. My oldest brother has interacted with my blogs since his death. I know that does sound crazy, but trust me…he has! That’s why I haven’t shut down my blogs yet. I feel like it’s my final connection with him. Call me crazy; I’ve been called worse.

Last month I celebrated six months post THR (total hip replacement). I feel pretty good overall. It still reminds me of what I can/cannot do, and running is one of those. However, I’m trying to embrace walking. I love that summer is getting closer. I was going a tad crazy on the elliptical. I walk 30 minutes, at least 3-4 times/week. I’m not fast, but I do it. This surgery has forced me to slow down, literally with walking. I notice things in my neighborhood I hadn’t seen before. I always ran and stayed focus on pushing through that.

I’m not a big fan of this time of year. On May 8 my dad has been gone two years. Out of all my family I have lost, I miss him the most. We were so close. My heart still feels ripped apart. May 10 is my mom’s birthday. And then Mother’s Day is coming soon. My mom’s birthday typically falls on or around Mother’s Day. All the reminders of my losses. I hate them all.

I seek the positive. My mom loves mourning doves. I have one in particular named, Lily. I name all my birds. Doves = peace = peace lily = Lily. Lily visits often. She will land on my mom’s bench. Walk across and then jump up on my Mary statue before flying off. This visit the other day was a little different. I always watch Lily do this, but before she flew off this time, she turned and looked right at me. I know that was my mom looking at me. I felt a sense of peace of her being close. I’m glad I caught it on camera.

Work is really busy. My projects are going full force, but I do enjoy my job. I love working from home as much as GMae does. I am still learning a lot and love the experiences my role offers to me. I know early next year I’ll start traveling more, but I look to that as experiences. I’m excited for the networking and opportunities which lie ahead. Lay? Lie? I struggled with that in grade school.

This blog is a little all over the place today. I have no apologies; this is how my brain works most days.

I’m getting flowers planted and enjoying watching the growth. How often do we go through life in a hurry? Working on a tight deadline? Feeling like we can’t work fast enough or have enough hours in the day? I’m that way all the time.

Yesterday my sweet baby girl brought me down to her level. She was in the sun smelling my newest basket of flowers. It made me stop to sit down. I didn’t rush her to hurry up and potty so I could get back to a meeting. I just sat and watched her. She was truly taking in the moment. We all need to take heed and oblige. I’m glad I snagged a picture of it as it’s such a beautiful moment.

I’ll add the picture at the end.

Until next time, peace out, Trout!